This is what happens to naughty girls

Most of you will know by now that we subscribe to the Naughty Step Principle and Chocolate Forcefeeding Method when it comes to keeping Saffron in check. Another lesser known trick we have up our sleeve is to point out to her signs which imply that misbehaviour may well lead to her transformation into confectionery. Yet another unexpected advantage in naming your child after a flower/food ingredient. Even if she - quite possibly - has to put up with being nicknamed 'Spice Girl' for the rest of her school-going life.

Since we're on the subject of names...we had picked out Saffron's name well before she was born, but the moment we laid eyes on her, we realised that she looked more like a Lucy (her second name). Still, we had gotten so used to calling her Saffron that it seemed a little odd to change. That and the small niggling detail that her birth announcement cards had already been printed. Four years on and I still think she looks like 'a Lucy' but can't imagine her by any other name than Saffron.